Yousane hopefully someday lyrics5/2/2024 ![]() When I was living in New York I remember feeling a need for my kids to be perceived a certain way – smart, active, social. In America, from my experience, the child is held under the parents wing for longer, and along with it comes the feeling that the kids’ successes are interlinked with the parents’. My son’s highschool gives them 3 “mental health days” that they can use any time during the year to skip school.Īlso, if you’ve never been to Israel, you might be shocked to see teenagers in the army wielding rifles on the crosstown bus □ School age kids roam around the neighborhood on their own, and highschoolers have co-ed sleepovers. I can say that from what I’ve seen, Israeli parents are very trusting of their kids. It’s tempting to make a sweeping, Bringing Up Bebe -type statement about Israeli culture and the way they raise their kids, but my research sample is narrow. ![]() When your baby cries through dinner at a restaurant, your toddler whines at music class, your kid is challenged at school, or your pre-teen doesn’t have a social life or is acting out at home, it means accepting them AS IS while continuing to do your job (safety, love, teach skills.) Letting the kids be means trusting their process completely. It is NOT to ensure their success or achievements, to manipulate how others see them, or to make them seem cool, smart, beautiful, charming, talented, in the eyes of others. As a mom, my job is to keep the kids safe, give them love, and slowly teach skills that will help them live independently and have a gratifying life. ![]() It means having a clear sense of where my job begins and where it ENDS. Letting the kids be means not getting caught up in how my son’s behavior looks to others, what he should or shouldn’t be doing. Instagram perfectly showcases family success, parenting wins, vacation fun, career accomplishments. I was also raised in the US where life is showy. This lesson is contrary to every grain in my body – I was raised in a family where success is expected and prowess is to be displayed. So My Resolution for 2023 – LET THE KIDS BE.Īnd along with it, because our attitude to our kids is completely intertwined with our attitude to ourselves, Meanwhile, I was stuck in a moment of anxiety – I so wanted him to be personable with her, for her to love him, for him to love her, that without realizing it I intervened and possibly made him feel uncomfortable.Īnd that leads me to the lesson I’ve learned during my last year and a half in israel – let the kids be. It had a picture of a guitar and a ukulele and the guitar was saying to the uke – “Uke, I am your father.”) She was just trying to engage him in a non-threatening way. My friend shot me a disapproving look and said- “Why did you do that?”Īnd I thought – Why had I done that? It’s not like my friend had a burning curiosity about the shirt (which, by the way, was adorable. I waited a second, and then instinctively reached over and opened his arms. He grunted and didn’t make a move to bring his arms down. Happy new year dear Tunester! It’s 2023! Do you have a resolution for this year? Here’s mine…Ī friend of mine was over recently when she asked my eldest, whose arms were crossed in front of his chest, what was written on his shirt. Dear Tunester, Today I give you my resolution for 2023 and what I learned about parenting from living in Israel for the last year and a half.
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